Analytical Reflection on Oral Presentation

About a week ago, my team gave a presentation about implementing a stand-alone photovoltaic system as an alternative source of energy to my class. My team had to come up with a way to translate our technical proposal into a presentation and deliver the idea and solutions to the audience effectively. Although my team's idea was challenging as it was an ambitious proposal, feedbacks from our fellow students on our presentations were positive. Our classmates found our presentation easy to understand and feasible. On top of that,  Brad, our lecturer, found our presentation to be very informative as we were able to present the extensive research that my group had done in our presentation. I was particularly relieved when Brad mentioned that our pitch was well-founded as I spent hours researching on how to deliver a good pitch. Of course, there were moments where nerve got the better of me and I started to halt briefly in my speeches. Fortunately, I was able to stay calm and avoid a nervous wreck. Although it was saddening that my group was not voted as the best, I am proud of the efforts my team had put into the project.

I felt that the reason my group was not voted the best was probably due to the ambitious nature of our project. A major investment would be needed in order for SIT to trial the stand-alone system and my classmates probably felt the difficulty we would face in implementing the project. Nonetheless, I felt our presentation was a success as my team was able to bring across our ideas to our audience effectively. My team spent hours together discussing and drafting our proposal. Even up to the week of our presentation, my team was still researching extensively to ensure that we cover all loose ends and ensure our presentation was flawless. I am fortunate to have such hardworking and reliable teammates to ensure that we spread the workload evenly and always lend each other a helping hand.

In conclusion, although it was disappointing that my team's hard work did not culminate in my team becoming the best in presentation, I feel that through this experience my teammates and I can grow stronger. I strongly believe that as an aspiring engineer, the most important skill to have in life is perseverance and hard work. Whenever the going gets tough, never give up and always look to improve ourselves. Therefore, I strive to ensure that in the future, I always give my best efforts in every obstacle I face and ensure that I have no regrets no matter the outcome of my hard work.

Commented on:
Ahmad's Analytical reflection (09/12/16)
Danish's Analytical reflection (09/12/16)

Final Reader Response (Draft 4) Revised

In the article, "This Detroit house is being turned into a living model of cost-saving sustainable design", Peters (2016) introduced a project named "Motown Movement", an initiative by three architecture students who bought a house in Detroit and converted it into a sustainable cost-efficient house. According to Peters (2016), the three students aimed to help the residents in Detroit find affordable ways to achieve sustainability. Peters shared that before "Motown Movement" started, the three students visited Detroit to gather information about the city. Through the three students visit to Detroit, the students came up with an idea to help teach residents of Detroit more affordable ways to achieve sustainability.  Peters stated that the three students plan to convert the lower level of the house they bought in Detroit into a “training centre”  and the upper-level into a house for a family in need. The three students hoped that through collaboration with their university, "Motown Movement" could become universal and reach out to other countries. However, Peters failed to include the emotions behind the project "Motown Movement" in her article, which I felt would have connected to us readers of the article more.

Firstly, Peters failed to allow us, readers, to feel the emotion of the three students and why they decided to embark on the project "Motown Movement". In Peters's article, she was very detailed in sharing the plans of the three students, such as building a “greywater system” and “septic tank” as sources of renewable energy. Although Peters was very detailed in her descriptive writing, the lack of sharing on the emotions of the three students keeps us readers at a distant from the project. Research studies (Hill, 2011) has shown that readers like to feel emotion whenever they are reading. Emotion's in writing has the ability to transfer from the author and come alive in readers (Johansen, 2015). Readers naturally like to be able to relate to the project the article is sharing and immerse themselves within the article so that they can experience the project first-hand. As such, it is important for Peters to include the emotions of the three students so that us, readers, can connect better emotionally with the project "Motown Movement."

Furthermore, Peters should include the feelings and thoughts of the community of Detroit in her article. Peters vaguely mentioned about the feelings of the community in Detriot by stating that "the people were much more positive". Peters should have elaborated further by adding the emotions of the community in Detroit towards the changes that have happened due to "Motown Movement". A fine example was an article by Olin College, where senior citizens shared their feelings and struggles with the college students to help identify solutions to the senior citizen's struggles. "One project resulted in a team building a device to help elderly people get out of a car more easily" (Olin College of Engineering, 2016). We can clearly see that sharing with the readers the thoughts and feelings of the senior citizens who are experiencing the project first-hand, allows us, readers, to feel for the senior citizens and see how much the project meant to them. As such, It is important to note that the thoughts of the community of Detroit are important as they are the people who are experiencing the project first-hand. The thoughts of the community of Detroit towards the project would allow us readers to recreate their experience and draw us readers directly into the experience of the community of Detroit. (Panuccio, 2016)

In conclusion, although Peters was very detailed in sharing the plans of the three students and giving us an idea of what "Motown Movement" is about, the lack of sharing of the emotions behind the project keeps us readers at a distant from the project. By adding the emotions of the three students and community of Detroit in the article, Peters would have influenced the views of us readers greatly and helped the students receive added support for "Motown Movement." The added support from the readers of Peters article would have contributed to the project "Motown Movement" reaching a global scale.

References

Hill, B. (2011, February 8). Creating Emotion in Readers. Retrieved from http://theeditorsblog.net/2011/01/30/creating-emotion-in-the-reader/

Johansen, J. (2015, February 2). How To Create Strong Emotional Response In Your Reader. Retrieved from http://www.livewritethrive.com/2015/02/02/how-to-create-a-strong-emotional-response-in-your-readers/

Olin College of Engineering, Projects That Help Others. (2016). Retrieved from http://www.olin.edu/projects-research/help-others/

Panuccio, N. (2016). Writing For Emotional Impact. Retrieved November 10, 2016, from http://emergingwriters.us/writing-for-emotional-impact/

Peters, A. (2016, 7 July,). This Detroit house is being turned into a living model of cost-saving sustainable design. FastCoexist.com. Retrieved from https://www.fastcoexist.com/3061563/world-changing-ideas/this-detroit-house-is-being-turned-into-a-living-model-of-cost-saving-s

Letter of Transmittal

Email to Estates Division, SIT @ Dover
16 October 2016

Ms Lee
Manager Estates
Singapore Institute of Technology
SIT @ Dover
10 Dover Drive
Singapore 138683
Proposal for implementing solar panels for the future SIT campus
Dear Ms. Lee,

I am Jerry Leong, a first-year SIE (Land) student. A module that I am currently taking requires me and my team to identify an engineering problem and propose a solution. After discussing with our effective communication lecturer, Brad, we were told to seek the estate division to have our inquiries answered.

The engineering problem the team has come up with is that most buildings rely on a main electrical grid to ensure operations daily and if there is a sudden power shutdown, daily operations will be affected until the issue can be resolved.

To solve this problem, the team is proposing for solar panels to be installed so that the solar energy harnessed could be used to replace the main grid while maintenance work is ongoing. This solution will help to ensure daily operations can be carried out even when there is a power failure.

We hope to meet up with any of the planning officers who can share with us the structural plans for the upcoming campus so that we would have a better understanding of the plans and prepare our proposal accordingly.

With Regards,
Jerry Leong (Team Leader)
On Behalf of Team Fudge